The men who fought for Canada in the Great War of 1914-1917 have been gone from our sight for many years. Remembrance Day 2021 is approaching, but we can scarcely find any living veterans who saw combat in World War II. The ranks of soldiers who took part in the Korean War get smaller with each passing year.

These people, the living connections to the great conflicts of the past, are slowly fading from our lives, and taking with them tangible reminders of the sacrifices made to secure the freedom of future generations.

It is up to each of us to ensure that the memories of the wars, the stories of heroism, selflessness, courage, and grief be passed on to future generations. How many times have we heard this plea? Are we doing justice to those who have passed us “the torch”? Have we held it high?

From my earliest recollection, I was aware that Remembrance Day held a very special significance in our family. It was a holiday from school when I was young, but it was not a day for shopping trips, or vacations, or any kind of celebration.

The mood in our home was somber, and just before 11 o’clock in the morning we gathered in the living room around the TV to watch the ceremony from Ottawa at the National War Memorial. By example, my mother showed how to remember those who fought and died for our country.

My mother always felt blessed because her own father had been too young to fight in the First World War and her brothers were too young or not able to serve during the Second World War. Several of her uncles and future in-laws saw active service.

Just living through those war years, surrounded by wartime tragedies affected her deeply. Over the years, her comments about pivotal moments in wartime history allowed me to see the emotions generated by those events.

Regularly, letters and Christmas packages arrived for my mother from England. They were from her best friend, Pauline.

Pauline’s family was from England and her high school graduation gift was a trip back there in the summer of 1939. When war was declared, Pauline was unable to get back to Canada and spent the war years and the rest of her life there in Great Britain.

Regular correspondence with Pauline allowed my mother a window into the terrible conditions during the Blitz and the devastation and hardship endured by the English after the war. Fifty years after the war the two besties were able to meet again and share their memories in person.

When my mother could no longer drive, I often took her to Jackson Park. She loved to see the rose gardens. The beds of multi-coloured blooms surrounded the Lancaster Bomber, a warplane mounted above a granite plaque bearing the names of those who served in the RAF and RCAF.

My mother was drawn to the memorial and her arthritic fingers softly touched each name engraved on the stone. They lingered over several names that I did not recognize. She whispered that she had gone to a dance with that one, and she was good friend to the sister of another. She quietly indicated that another one had married a neighbour girl and never seen his baby son who was born after he died.

A small tear rolled down her cheek as she touched another name. I did not ask why. She had withdrawn into her memories for the moment. In that quiet way she shared her stories with me.

Mom was uncharacteristically vocal about the Dieppe Raid that took place on August 19, 1942. On that ill-fated day the Essex Scottish’s Windsor regiment lost 121 men. She knew several of the families that suffered the loss of a son.

She believed that the British, under Lord Louis Mountbatten, had made a grave tactical error and sent the Canadians to their deaths. Although she was always a monarchist at heart, Mom did not shed a tear when he was assassinated by the IRA in 1979.

The memories my mother shared about the war years helped me to better understand the reasons we hold Remembrance Day services and gave me a personal connection to the tragedy and sacrifice caused by war.

With each passing generation it becomes a bit more difficult to make that connection. It can not be left to the schools or the veterans or the Legions to preserve these stories. Search out those family memories and share them with the next generation.

Photos provided by Betsey Sabara