Is there racism in Kingsville, you ask? Some residents find this downright comical. Some residents find this to be offensive. How could anyone think there is racism in our little peaceful town of Kingsville?
When the Black Lives Matter protest was announced, many — and I mean many — took exception to this event and had their own views. But very few people in our town or the surrounding communities asked a person of colour if there is racism here.
Well guess what? There is.
Racism is unfortunately everywhere and there are thousands of stories of it, but the majority of us keep those stories to ourselves. Hurtful stories that bite at us every day, but we feel no one will listen or care. Things a person should never have to go through and all just because of the colour of our skin.
We feel we have nowhere to turn for the support we need, especially in a predominantly white community.
I, Tim Stanley, was raised in Kingsville and have lived here now going on 40 years. I see it, I have seen it, and I have lived it, and I will unfortunately continue to live it unless something is truly done to once and for all stop it.
Folks, the stories are endless, alive and real. Personally I have dealt with this all my life.
I have been told to go play basketball by other kids and even adults.
I have been bullied and beaten up.
I have been told that my kind is lucky to have a job.
I have been pulled over for no reason.
I have been told I can’t date their daughter.
I have heard racial jokes and had to accept it.
I have been told not to speak.
I have lost out on promotions, jobs and pay increases.
I have been called a monkey, a coon and a nigger.
These are just a handful of things I have been through, and trust me, there is much more. All because the colour of my skin.
This has taken a tremendous toll on each and every one of us, no matter how much we try to deflect it. It is embedded in our mind that maybe we are not good enough, maybe I can’t be that, maybe I don’t belong. We live on edge knowing that if we do the exact same thing as a privileged white person, the consequences will be triple.
We constantly live in fear knowing one mess up, one wrong move, could prove the racist narrative to be right. You see, when a person of colour, especially a black person, tries to defend ourselves in any situation it’s called “playing the race card.” But if we stay silent, which most of us do, racism is accepted and will continue in every society.
The worst part is that I know that this article will not change one thing moving forward. But it sure has felt good being able to express some of the hurt built up inside over my lifetime.
My dream in life has always been to become a police officer to serve and protect and be a positive citizen within my community. Some of these same reasons above might have played a major part in that dream fading each day. I am not perfect, but who is?
Watching what those four police officers did to George Floyd on camera was unbearable. No matter what type of person he was, no one deserves to be treated like that by the people that are supposed to protect them.
I made myself a promise to go for my dream, be part of the solution, not the problem. I know it won’t be easy and I know I might never put on that blue uniform, but I will do everything I can to accomplish it.
The system and narrative has been set hundreds of years ago, and how dare we try to change it? The privileged will always be privileged. This is our mindset — but should it be? Can it really be changed, or is this all for nothing?
It has to start at the top with our politicians, our mayors, our councillors, and our law enforcement. If we cannot get them to help change the system then it’s time to change who we vote for. For what this meant and for what we did on Sunday afternoon on June 7, 2020, could not have happened without the support from our councillors, local law enforcement and our Mayor Nelson Santos.
And let’s not forget the amazing support from many residents in our great little town that came out. We were completely overwhelmed. To see so many people show up and take part in this Black Lives Matter movement was amazing. To finally see our community recognize the injustice that people of colour go through every single day just because of the colour of our skin — I will always remember and thank each supporter for this day.
But what next, what is the solution? Just because we marched and had over voices finally heard for three hours — will this change anything? There has to be a better plan and outcome from this, no?
We love this community just as much as anyone else. We want to live, grow and raise our families here without any type of racism. We are not looking for sympathy, we are looking for equality. Who wouldn’t want this?
So in the future don’t speak for us. Ask us how it can be changed. Ask us what we are dealing with. Ask us to join and grow with you, alongside of you, just like we did on Sunday.
I say this to all the young people of colour in our community and across the world — I know exactly what you are dealing with and I can only pray it will get better. But for now stay strong, ignore the ignorance. Rise up, speak out, get educated and follow your dreams for whatever you want to be.
But remember, nothing in this world comes easy, so work hard for what you want and be proud of who you are. Racism will end one day. It has too.
Thanks once again, Kingsville, and United We Stand.
**Editor’s note —
And here’s a little more about the man, to help break down the stereotype. In his lifetime, Tim has been a firefighter, an inventor, a local hockey referee. He graduated from high school here in Kingsville.
Tim invented a toy called the Bottle Toss Band in 2017. The band is ready for manufacturing, though it’s presently on hold due to COVID-19. He is a proud father and husband, a business owner at Essex Arena Canteen and an active volunteer in our community. **JHS